no one would blame me, right?

if i just smothered my husband with a pillow? i'm not really serious, but this morning, it was dicey there for a bit. i've pretty much been up since @ 3 am this morning. and it's all bcuz of him & his freakin' sleep apnea! crap! he's had it for years, but was diagnosed and started treatment only in the last year or so. now.....let me paint a good & clear pic for you. his snoring is HORRIBLE!!!!! it's progressively gotten worse over the years to the point where it started either keeping me from falling asleep or waking me up in the middle of night. and many times both! i told him to go get it checked out, but did he? OF COURSE NOT!!!!! why should he listen to me? i don't know anything. when he was injured a couple of years ago, the hospital staff told him the exact same thing i had been saying. he still didn't get it checked out. freak! meanwhile, he complained that he wasn't getting decent rest (DUH!!!!!) and that would just set me off. OF COURSE he wasn't getting decent rest, cuz he'd stop breathing a million times during the night. HELLO??????? finally he got into a sleep study and was diagnosed with (.....wait for it.....wait for it.....TA DA!) sleep apnea. HOLY FREAKIN SHIT! what a breakthrough! he was placed on a cpap immediately and the pressure is set very high. the mask he has to wear shifts during the night and makes anywhere from a low whistle to a high howling noise. this is helpful? then of course during the night, he takes it off. what happens then? he snores! can't i get a break here?

so this morning, the mask starts making the howling noise @ 3 am. what does he do? takes it off and immediately starts snoring. i'm awake by now so once the snoring commences, it's nearly impossible for me to go back to sleep. i finally get up & get ready for work @ 6, and i doubt that i will make it through the day today. but, i will try. and, i will try not to smother him with a pillow tonight. however, if i am unable to resist the urge to have a relatively decent night's sleep myself, no one would really blame me, right? LOL