*Updated* Blog Hop '09 from the perspective of a (not so) noob blogger.

Reading all kinds of blog posts & tweets about BlogHer '09, I was jealous. I admit it. I wish I was there hangin' with the big dogs, partyin' like it's 1999, & learning from the best. Not this year, though. After finding out about it fairly late, I 1st ticked off the reasons of why I wasn't worthy to attend & then said, "Screw it. I'm totally worthy!" But then, my mental birthday block temporarily lifted and I remembered that the cruise for my 40th is coming up. BlogHer had to take a back seat this year.

So here I am playin' Bejeweled Blitz with the green-eyed monster. And I'm not alone. I don't blame the others either; Bejeweled Blitz is the bomb. The good news is we're not left out. We can party from home and it's even better, cuz we don't have to spend all the money to go to Chicago. We can even party in our pj's! What's better than that? Come join Blog Hop '09 & meet lots of other bloggers out there. I'm definitely not gonna miss this!

Update - I just now caught that I had put Blog Hop '90 in my title instead of '09. The fact that I caught that after tossin' back a few just might be scary. Hmmmmm.....

They hire geniuses at Burger King, but only the lower level geniuses.

There was no way to avoid getting breakfast on the way to work yesterday morning cuz I was starving. My options near work were REALLY limited, which meant.....Burger King. Oh joy. The total for my #1 with bacon and a small coke was $4.72. Perfect. I had a $10 and needed change to pay someone back. I pulled up to the window, handed the worker my money, and asked if I can have 5 $1 back. He stood there. And stared at me. Obviously, what he must have heard was "What is the square root of 5,732,945?". WE all know the answer to that, but apparently he missed that day at BKU. I didn't realize that asking for a specific denomination in my change would give him THAT much pause. Had he stood there any longer, I'm sure I would have started to smell smoke coming from his brain as he frantically tried to comprehend the meaning of life question that I posed to him. Wonder what he would have done if I had asked him a REALLY hard question like, "Do you like green eggs and ham? Do you like them, Sam-I-Am?"

D-Day approaches & I will storm the beaches of Normandy SLCC campus with guns blazing pencils ready.

The start of the fall semester is looming in the not too distant future, so I figured it was time to take a look at where I am with everything that needs to be done to kick this pig. No, I'm not really going to kick a pig, unless you have treasured loathesome stuffed pig with the stuffing starting to come out that you want to loan me. If we do this, though, you should know it's safe to say that you won't get your pig back.

Wait a minute.....what the hell was I talking about? Oh yeah...college checklist. (Sigh) There are days I still can't believe I am actually attempting this torture yet AGAIN. But things seem to be falling into place pretty well & quickly, so that must mean that this is the right time in my life to get this done. 3rd time's a charm, right? Below is my initial checklist that just covers the basics at a high-level. I didn't think it was necessary to get really detailed by adding things like: (Under Apply for financial aid) Pull at least 1/2 your hair out trying to find all the required financial documentation that you thought you were through with once you finally got off your ass & filed your god damned taxes. That just goes without saying, right?

Apply/get accepted (completed)

Take placement tests (completed)

Complete New Student Orientation (completed)

Apply for financial aid

Select classes

Register for classes

Start classes VERY IMPORTANT!

I'm applying for financial aid while working on selecting my classes, cuz that's just the kind of psychotic awesome multitasker I am. I'm even finding time/energy to keep my blog updated with my academic escapades. Damn, I'm good. Now if I could just figure out what my major should be? I couldn't find professional alcohol consumer on the list. I'm at a loss.

*updated* You shouldn't piss me off in a room full of knives.

Sadly, the husband & I are sitting at the kitchen table.....playing on our respective laptops. Yes, this is our Saturday night entertainment. I have yet to decide if we have no lives, are getting old, or are just too fucking lazy to do something decent on a Saturday nite. It seriously went downhill when the husband opened his mouth & inserted both feet (as he usually does). After a lull in the conversation, he says, "I'm looking on Travis' page right now." I asked, "His Facebook page? Are you still on Facebook?" He replied, "Yeah. His oldest daughter? Is really freakin' cute." And I'm all, "Dood! I'm sitting right FUCKING here!!!!!!!!!!"

Now I realize that this is pretty much a marriage of convenience (& certainly not the good kind of convenience), but I now keep looking over at the knife block, trying to decide if it's worth going to jail to make my point. Hmmm...decisions, decisions.

Update - The husband tried to get out of he hole he had dug himself into by saying, "If she were mine, she would be locked up."

So not helping your case dood.

I should be banned from all staff meetings.

I'm usually pretty quiet in staff meetings. I keep my comments to myself until after when the little groups break apart into their more intimate bitch sessions. Today was another story. I had serious difficulty in keeping my comments to myself today when it came to discussing the merger/layoffs. Granted they were whispered to my friend sitting next to me, but still.....

Co-worker: I wonder what kind of morale booster they will have.

Me: cattle prod.

Co-worker: I'm sure they could come up with a really nice morale booster.

Me: oh...scented cattle prod.

She started rolling & I was laughing so hard I drooled on the table. Everyone else in the meeting was wondering what was wrong with us, especially when she got up to get me a tissue to wipe the table. Cuz no one wants to put their hands in someone else's spit, no matter how funny the joke was that caused it to be there. I think the department head was glad for the 5 weeks where I missed the staff meetings.